Women Orgasm versus Men Orgasm

    A research made in the Portugal revealed that 27% of the Portuguese women rarely or never have an orgasm during a sexual relation, while only 1% of the Portuguese men that have the same problem. Why is it so different for a man to have an orgasm than for a woman? Orgasms in men and women are very different for many reasons: physiological, psychological and cultural. A woman usually takes longer to reach an orgasm, but when she does, it last longer then in a man. Most man has orgasm in every sexual relation he has. That doesn’t happen to the majority of women, but women can have multiple orgasms while men can’t and men takes longer then women after a sexual relation to be able to have another relation. It is not an easy achievement, but it is possible to, both man and woman to have a healthy sexual relationship, but it might involve a great deal of intimacy, practice and tranquility between the couple.

    For women, customarily is more difficult to have an orgasm than for men because of a series of facts: men normally take less time to reach an orgasm, and when they do, some men “call it a night”, after they “are done”, they don’t make an effort to make their partner reach an orgasm; women need more psychological and physical stimulus then men to reach an orgasm, specially a vaginal orgasm, which is more difficult, because they take longer to be stimulated enough to be able to have pleasure during the penetration; a large number of women don’t know their body good enough to know what they like, and when they do know, some are ashamed to “guide” their partner during a sexual relation; a lot of couples don’t talk about their sex problems, decreasing their chances of solving them; and innumerous other factors can be the cause of a women’s difficulty to have an orgasm. Men tend to have less difficulty to get an orgasm. Men’s most common sexual problem is the opposite: premature ejaculation. 30% of men suffer from premature ejaculation. But, having a premature ejaculation or not, more than 95% of men say that they have orgasm every time they have a sexual relation. It can be harder for women to reach an orgasm, but when they do, theirs last longer then a man’s orgasm.

    Another difference between men and women is that it is possible for women to have multiple orgasms, that is, to have one orgasm after another in a very short period of time. Not many women can have multiple orgasms because it requires her being very comfortable and having a deep intimacy with her partner, among other things. But that is an advantage that only women have. Men are not physiologically able to have multiple orgasms because they need some time after an ejaculation to be able to ejaculate again. They are not able to ejaculate one time after another in a matter of seconds.

    The fact that men cannot ejaculate continuously in a short period of time, explains why it takes a few minutes for a man to be able to have another erection, therefore, another sexual relation. Women, on the other hand, after having sex, can be physiologically prepared to have another sexual relation in seconds.

     Orgasms have different meaning for men and for women. The reason for that fact remains a question unanswered, because it involves cultural, anthropological, psychological and physical issues. 75% of men can reach an orgasm very fast, in the first minutes of a sexual relation. For women it isn’t so easy, only 25% of women reach an orgasm during a sexual relation, but women’s orgasm lasts from twenty seconds to two minutes, while it lasts only a few seconds for men. Aside the difference between a man and a woman’s orgasm, there is a universal consensus that the intense pleasure of an orgasm is genuinely related to self-control and self-esteem. Therefore, to the intense pleasure of an orgasm be possible, couples need to invest more in sexual “games”, in the romantic and sexual environment than in the worry of reaching an orgasm. Orgasm should be a consequence of a pleasurable sexual relation, not is objective.

Midterm

New York,  New York!

Which aspiring actress doesn´t dream about going to New York to take an interpretation course there, or try to act on or off Broadway? As an aspiring actress myself, I would say very few actresses wouldn´t. At least, that was always my dream. However, my dream was not only going to New York to study or to act, but to see it again as an adult, because the last time I´d been there, I was too young to remember. I´d had this dream for over five years when, this year as a birthday present, my father gave to me and to my mother tickets to go to NY in February, during the Brazilian Carnival.

My mother and I couldn´t be more excited. I was particularly pleased because I was about to fulfill my dream. In January, we began making plans. We made reservations in a magnificent hotel overlooking the  Central Park, and made sure that our room had a beautiful view. We called our American friends that live in Charlotte, NC, and asked them if they could join us in our trip to New York. Only two of  them could make it on such a short notice. Nevertheless, not only did they join us in NY, but they treated us with a four-day trip to Washington, DC! My mom cried in  excitment with the surprise. She  lived for a year in Washington, DC when she was eighteen years old and had fallen in love with the city.

This trip to NY was a combination of pleasant company and interesting activities. Our friends proved to be great fellow travelers, as well as well-informed guides throughout varied projects such as visiting the MOMA, the American Museum of Natural History, charming neiborhoods like the Soho, Greenwish Village, Chinatown;  their presence also meant shared enjoyment of gastronomic ventures in the city’s wonderful international restaurants, bars and coffee-shops.

As a future actress, my inner dreams came true when I was able to see great performances in astonishing productions of plays and musicals, both on and off Broadway. Time flew by as I saw the “Jersey Boys” depicting the beginning of the career of The Four Sesons; the cast of “Mamma Mia” reminding me of the lovely songs the ABBA used to enchant us with; wonderful acting in several off Broadway plays. It was an inspiring, motivativating and uplifting occasion for this actress to be.

Washington, D.C. was a surprise to me. I´d expected it to be a bit boring in the sense that every attraction there would be historical or political. Not that I´m not interested in those subjects, but after an overdose of them, you want to be able to relax and unwind, and D.C. provides you with plenty of places to do that. I had more fun there than I had anticipated.

Upon coming back, my mother decided that she wanted to spend some time living in Washington, D.C. next year. I liked that idea so much that I decided to join her and spend a semester in the States in order to deepen my knowledge in the English language and the American culture. My father disagreed with my plans because he thought that it would more productive for me if I took a course in my area of interest, so he suggested that I went to NY to take an acting course. I was even happier with this scenario and started making plans, which will come true in about three months!

Essay # 2

Acting versus Feeling

Is a good actor supposed to cry when simply asked to do it? No. A good actor has to convey specific emotions to the spectators. He or she has to go on stage to act, to relate to the other characters and to the story, to believe in the circumstances in the story, but not necessarily to feel the emotions that the character is supposedly feeling. For an actor, having feelings during an act is a consequence that can happen or not, but a consequence that he or she should never anticipate during an act. In his studies, Constantin Stanislavski, who was a Russian actor and theater director in the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries, realized that recalling a memory to express an emotion realistically during an act (emotional memory technique) as an instrument for an actor constantly lead actors to hysteria. “Don’t use your conscious past,” said the American actress and acclaimed acting teacher Stella Adler. “Use your creative imagination to create a past that belongs to your character.” On the other hand, some actors prep professionals such as Fatima Toledo, prefer to work with non actors and believe that an actor doesn’t have to build a character to relate to the story, he or she has to find the character in themselves, not knowing in advance what is going to happen to the character during the story.

Stanislavski never discarded completely his theory on Emotional Memory, but later in his life he would advise actors to use it only as a rehearsal tool or as a technique for researching a specific character. Later, he developed The Method of Physical Action, through which an actor, as much as he or she has to believe in the circumstances given by the story and the relations between the characters, has likewise to always stay one step behind complete belief. When the Brazilian actress Camila Morgado played the character of the German communist militant Olga Benario Prestes in the movie “Olga”, she believed so deeply in the circumstances, that she had problems to “get out” of character when the movie was finished. On the her character’s birthday, she called her friends asking them if they would congratulate her for that date. It is unsafe and risky to believe intensely that a story is real, and a part of your life. An actor should always know how to distinguish reality from fiction.

Stella Adler believed that actors should not conjure up emotions by using their personal memories, but by using the act’s given environment. Adler’s techniques consist on carrying through tasks, wants, needs and objectives, as opposed to remembering an emotion. It also aspires to stimulate the actor’s imagination through the use of “as ifs.” The Australian actor Heath Ledger told a journalist of “The New York Times” that the roles he played in the movies “I’m Not There” and “The Dark Night” took his ability to sleep. “Last week I probably slept an average of two hours a night. … I couldn’t stop thinking,” said Ledger. “My body was exhausted, and my mind was still going.” If an actor doesn’t make good use of his or hers imagination and doesn’t discern what’s real and what’s not, a character as complex as the Joker in “The Dark Night” can be extremely disturbing.

Some actors, prep professionals and directors don’t agree with Stanislavski and Adler’s concept of acting and think that to make an actor play its part realistically, it is indispensable to disrupt him or her mentally and psychologically. Fatima Toledo is a prep professional that claims that actors have to experience the same sensations that the character experiences during the story. “This is a painful method because people have to get rid of their vanity and explore their darker side” says Fatima Toledo. “I do not worship anyone. I destroy actors.” To prepare the Brazilian actor Wagner Moura to play Captain Nascimento in the movie “Tropa de Elite”, Fatima Toledo called the ex-BOPE policeman Paulo Storani, who appealed to Moura´s weakest point, i.e. his family. Moura ended up breaking Storani’s nose and almost quitting the job. Acting is a profession like any other, actors must be able to go out with friends, girlfriends or boyfriends after a play or after a recording day, as any professionals of other areas do.

Actors, therefore, cannot aim at feeling the same emotions that their characters go through, even though this may happen. They have to believe in the circumstances depicted, but they have to bear in mind that there is a distinct line between real and fictional. It is clear that there are several different ways in which an actor can approach a given character. As a professional, an actor has to think twice before crying simply because he is asked to do it.

Cynthia – Writing #1

I thought I hated Sao Paulo… Now I know I love it!

    My brothers and I spent our childhood as prisioners in our own house. We lived freely only inside our house’s walls. My father was afraid that something would happen to us, that we would be kidnaped, assaulted, or even get killed, so he hired bodyguards to follow us whenever we went out of the house. His fear got worst when he received a call from someone threatening to kidnap me where I used to go to ride my horses. After that incident, Sao Paulo became a spoiled city for me. I couldn’t walk on the streets like everyone else, I couldn’t even walk in the mall without being followed. So, because of our lack of freedom, my brothers and I talked to my parents and they decided to move from Sao Paulo to Florianopolis.

    My family and I were very excited about the idea of a place where we wouldn’t have to be followed all the time, where we wouldn’t spend so many hours a day in traffic, where we would be able to go to the beach during the week, etc. Florianopolis was a dream for us. A dream that was about to come true. We bought a big, beautiful house right on the beach and moved there during the summer, when the sun shines every day and the weather is very welcoming. I couldn’t wait for my first day at school. I was very ecxited to meet new people in that magical island. I tought that no one that lived in that beautiful place wouldn’t be charming and upbeat. Sweet ilusion!

    On my first day in school I realised I couldn’t be more wrong. When I arrived in school in, I immediately wanted to turn around and go home change my outfit. All the girls in the school were wearing heels, a lot of make-up, and jewelry and I was wearing my brother’s t-shirt, wich was huge on me, because I lost mine and he was on my class because he was one year behind, and tennis shoes. I was wearing what I would wear to go to school in Sao Paulo. The girls there were not only exaggerated in the way they dress, but they were also concided and didn’t like people from other citys beside Florianopolis. And soon I discovered that it wasn’t only the girls that didn’t like outsiders, but the people there in general.